The Brunch Table

I remember hearing once that, if you sign up for the frequent, er, train-user program on the Amtrak site, you get a fantastic list of possible honorifics to choose from. Today, I found out for myself. “That’s ‘Rabbi Prince,’ if you please.” Oh, wait, I think I prefer “Hon. Chief Petty Officer.” Or, let’s just take this as far as possible, “Pastor Prince Princess Professor.”

That one’s actually not too bad.

Although a little too gender-conflicted for a pop star maybe.

…does the Windows XP “ding” remind you of anything? Like…a certain pop hit from the days of the First Iraq War? I can’t help completing the rest of the phrase in my head (ba-ding, dum da-dum-da-dum-da dum-da dum dum) every time I hear it.

Naughty By Nature should sue Microsoft. Let the big guys try and prove a negative in copyright law for a change.

BBC’s got a series of audio lectures by neurologist Vilayanur Ramachandran on how brains work.

It’s a dark day for believin’ in humankind’s essential goodness. There was an upset last week in the UK’s 20th Anniversary Iterated Prisoner’s Dilemma Competition–an AI contest in which programs try to either work together to earn points in small quantities, or exploit each other by stealing points in large quantities. Until now, it was a bit of consolation in an otherwise-cruel world that, given enough turns to take effect, an altruistic strategy (cooperating with everyone who cooperates with you, while remembering and countering those who don’t) would invariably win the game in the end. Straight exploitation, while providing some great initial gains, accumulates too much risk over time.

But if I understand right, this year’s winners finally dethroned the nice guys with a new, unwholesome strategy–basically, the Mafia. In successive rounds of the game, the highest-scoring programs are allowed to “reproduce,” fielding more copies of themselves. The Mafia “master” was designed to execute a signature series of moves that its clones would recognize. The clones then became kamikazes, taking the aggressive exploitation strategy and trying to amass as many short-term points as possible, without regard for their own long-term survival. They would then conspire to lose repeatedly to the master program, which would just sit back and rake in the points.

Oh well.

I’ve sat out the entire four years of the Interregnum without passing on, much less generating, a single politically-motivated net petition, no matter how well-intentioned. Finally, I’ve found something that’s made me break with my principles.

It’s the Guardian’s Operation Clark County. It’s for non-U.S.-citizens only. Upon signing in, you’ll be given the postal address of a randomly-selected voter in Clark County, OH. You’re asked to send them an earnest plea to, er, support the candidate of your choice.

“In the spirit of the Declaration of Independence’s pledge to show ‘a decent respect to the opinions of mankind’, we have come up with a unique way for non-Americans to express your views on the policies and candidates in this election to some of the people best placed to decide its outcome. It’s not quite a vote, but it’s a chance to influence how a very important vote will be cast. Or, at the very least, make a new penpal…Be courteous. Remember that it’s unusual to receive a lobbying letter from someone in another country. Think about how you would respond if you received a letter from Ohio urging you to vote for Tony Blair - or Michael Howard…”