The Brunch Table

3/30/2004

The circle is now complete?

Filed under: — Nick @ 1:40 pm

I received unsolicited mail today from “Napoleon Franks” and “Youngblood Benzedrine.” I don’t know about everybody else, but my spam names definitely tend toward the macho…With these two latest additions, I now have enough characters saved up to make a TV show. I call it “SpamCops.”

INT. POLICE STATION, DAY

     CERVANTES      But take a look at this.

He holds out a grainy black-and-white photo of a grinning fat man seated behind a desk. Youngblood and Napoleon stare at it intently. The face is hard to make out, but…

     YOUNGBLOOD      It’s Paperboys J. Mercantile! I knew it.

Napoleon shakes his head slowly.

     NAPOLEON (in fake British accent)      Don’t you worry, Chief, we’ll take care of that jolly old fellow all right.

     CERVANTES      Now, no rough stuff….

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